__Question:__ Which is correct--Three and four IS nine or three and four ARE nine?

__Answer:__ Neither. Three and four are seven.

"My dog knows math. I asked him what 16 minus 16 is and he said nothing."

__Question:__ A man caught a fish that weighed five pounds plus half of its own weight. How much did it weigh?

__Answer:__ Ten pounds.

__Question:__I'm taking three courses in college: French, Spanish, and Algebra

__Sal:__ Okay--let me hear you say hello in algebra.

A PERSONAL NOTE: The last one is supposed to be humorous, but consider the following...."Use a calculator to solve X - 289 = 845....now rotate the calculator (i.e. turn it upside down)...and read the screen!